We have all heard the horror stories of housemates who can’t cook, or leave mouldy bread on the side for weeks, but what about the life-long friendships that can be formed from these random assignments?
The probability of finding your best friend out of a random group of 3-12 people is very low but not impossible. In my own experience, my longest and most meaningful friendships have come from forced proximity in places such as school and work. We all know the power a seating plan in science could have, so is it not the same for the people you are randomly assigned to live with?
The shared experiences and endless time together creates a sense of security as you are forced into socialising, especially if you are sharing difficult experiences with a troublesome landlord, or the stress of university. We all know how easily flatcest comes about because of these reasons and while that may not be the best example of life-long relationships, it just goes to show how easy it is to form a bond with randomly assigned people.
Forming friendships within your house can come naturally and be easy, but maintaining them for a longer period of time can pose a real problem. It is all about effort and context. If you only see these people in the kitchen over dinner or passing on the stairs, chances are your friendship is purely for convenience rather than out of desire. With the right amount of effort in expanding your friendship beyond the confines of your house,I think you might find that your friendships last longer with greater meaning. That doesn’t mean you have to plan some elaborate trip, but simply connect over social media and message while you are separated over the holidays or during the week to maintain your friendship.
In my own experience I’ve been blessed by a group of fairly clean (there’s one exception and he knows who he is), decent humans who are open to the idea of friendship and while I fear I may not stay in contact with all of them for years to come friendship is a concept which can always be worked at. With the right amount of effort (on both ends) the length and commitment of friendship knows no bounds. So next time you’re looking for a housemate, don’t fear the facebook group chat or a random assignment, you never know, your best man, maid of honour or even spouse could be waiting to meet you.
