So, you’ve decided to take advantage of the new additions to the Green List, but it’s just your luck to have been attacked by a Lovecraftian monstrosity from the depths of the Pacific on your way and now you’re stranded alone on a deserted island.
After you’ve had a moment to cuss out Cthulhu, it decides to grant you one video game to keep you company while on the island. What impeccable luck. But what game do you pick?
Dark Souls 2 – Callum Brown
At first I went to pick one of my favourite games ever made, Bloodborne, but then I realised I’ve played that game to death already, so it would likely get boring after about 5 or 6 runs. Clearly I need something I already enjoy but haven’t played too much of to keep me interested, and then it hit me. The black sheep of the Soulsborne franchise, Dark Souls 2, would be the best game to keep me company.
Many fans of the franchise consider Dark Souls 2 their least favourite in the series; it does a lot differently from the first game which many hold as the greatest piece of interactive media ever made, so naturally veteran Dark Souls players were immediately put off. It was the last one out of all the Dark Souls games I played for this reason, and while I grew to love it as I played, (I think it’s better than the first game please don’t kill me) I’ve played Dark Souls 2 the least, making it the perfect deserted island game for me.
Firstly, Dark Souls 2 has an incredible world and oppressive atmosphere just like the first game which works in tandem with the same challenging but fun combat, yet what makes being stuck with it for the rest of my days truly great is that there is so much variety when it comes to weapons and magic options meaning I can replay the game endlessly with a different playstyle every time. A bonus is that this is the one in the series I have the least experience with, so I will still be learning new stuff as I play.
Dark Souls 2 also has the most content out of all the games in the series. Three expansions add whole new areas and nine bosses, giving the game 41 bosses in total, making it the entry with the most bosses in the franchise. I still haven’t gotten round to starting even one of the expansions yet which means I still have brand new content waiting for me to discover.
Overall, while Dark Souls 2 isn’t my favourite game ever made, nor is it the best in the franchise, though it is the perfect game to be stuck with as I already love the game but still have a lot to discover.
Football Manager 2021 – Yaroslav Matveev
On the deserted island, time will pass incredibly slowly, so the game I choose needs to be time consuming and captivating. Perhaps the game which best suits that criteria, for me, is Football Manager 2021.
Essentially, you get a chance to manage virtually any team in the world and lead it to glory. You can pick your favourite team or manage in a country you’ve never heard of. As a coach, you are responsible for all aspects of the club’s life – tactics, transfers, dealing with the board, and growing future generations of talents.
It is not the most visually attractive game nor is the sound design anything to write home about (not that you could) – it is basically like going through football-based Excel spreadsheets.
However, Football Manager is available on almost all devices – PC, Tablets and, starting from FM2021, it is even on Xbox. The features vary from version to version giving an opportunity to choose depending on your play style.. There is also a very boiled down version called Football Manager Mobile where dots move about on the screen rather than 3D models when simulating matches and all other features are simplified – perfect for players who are trying to conserve battery life on an island with no phone chargers…
And have I mentioned yet that Football Manager is also incredibly fun to play? Match engine bugs sometimes lead to hilarious own goals or unrealistic body movements as well as bizarre transfers which put Fifa’s occasionally buggy hilarity to shame. It is also a great way to learn more about different countries and clubs from around the globe: Partisan Belgrade in Serbia, Lincoln Red Imps in Gibraltar, Tow Law Town in England are just a few great clubs with thrilling stories I discovered thanks to this game. And if there is one thing I’ll be needing while stranded in the middle of nowhere, it’s knowledge of random low-profile football clubs from across the globe. If you are into football and want to go slightly deeper than just playing Fifa’s Ultimate Team, then Football Manager is a perfect choice.
The Binding of Isaac: Rebirth – Reiss Mason
Painful repetition and intense crying: two things I’ll have to get used to on the deserted island mostly because of my choice of game. The Binding of Isaac is a rogue-lite about a child called Isaac who escapes his zealot mother’s murderous wrath by locking himself in the basement, fights off religious monstrosities with his tears, and eventually dies in a toy chest buried deep within her withered womb.
Well, that’s one interpretation anyway. At its mechanical core, however, The Binding of Isaac is simply a randomly generated twin-stick dungeon crawler. Just the kind of arcade-y fun I’ll need to keep me entertained while isolated at sea.
See, I’m thinking about the long game here. Either I’m going to escape the island because I wasn’t playing video games, or I’m going to die because I never got up from my laptop to make a fire. Luckily, The Binding of Isaac is so brutally difficult and features so many frustrating ways to die that I wouldn’t want to sit playing it for hours; I’d want to drown myself.
That said, I love The Binding of Isaac. Its thousands of unique items are endlessly interesting and each one contributes to a different style of play, synergising with one another to bombard the player with a completely different run every time you boot the game up. What I’m trying to say is that it wouldn’t get boring in the moments when I just need something comforting to snuggle up with after a long day of being hunted down by the fog monster from Lost.
Isaac’s situation wouldn’t even be so different from mine, and in such a dire scenario I want someone I can relate to. I mean, he’s perpetually stuck living out his worst nightmare by fighting for his life while attempting to escape the existential terror of false idols under religion, family tensions, and self-doubt, and I’d be trying to live off of raw crab. Our narratives match perfectly.
Overall, The Binding of Isaac would keep me entertained enough to distract me from any oversized spiders, but not so wrapped up that I forget to bother eating.
And I can play it on the 3DS.
Images: robmcm, flickr
