alone again
the past months have been drowned in swarming clouds of chatter,
rushing
rushing
rushing
urgently dancing between fears
and conclusions,
pulled through paranoia and revelation; consumed by mind not moment.
i haven’t been happy, despite it all;
a shrunken shell
waiting to be picked up and taken home.
i thought it was you.
embrace that i sink in;
smile that ignites me into life.
i pinned my world on your shoulders,
like you were the sun i’d
shrivel without.
and now you’re gone.
and i’m trying to dig myself up
where i buried it
so long ago,
tarnished and caved in
by the fist of another.
i am trying to remember
how i existed,
confidently
alone.
