Full Name: University of Sheffield Memes
Age: (undisclosed)
Course & Year of Study: I’m not sure
Talk to us a little about your background…
Well I don’t really know, really. I kinda just came to this university because it was there, got lost in the SU and I don’t know how to leave.
Why do you want to be SU President?
We believe that the students at the University of Sheffield need a radical, massive shakeup of the system.
For too long students have held the title of Student Union President, maybe it’s time for a meme page to hold that title – it’s only right.
What are your policies, list 5-10 key pledges?
- Launch an investigation in collaboration with the Biosciences and Engineering Departments into the Information Commons Showers.
- Rebuild the Wave again (it was kinda funny last time).
- Replace all University Assignments with Kahoot Quizzes.
- Replace Duo Login with Duolingo Login to keep up streaks.
- Flatten Endcliffe Crescent and Conduit Road in order to prevent death by hill.
- Declare Independence from Sheffield and form our own new city named Roaryville.
- Move the Diamond to Hillsborough, far away from the campus.
- Take First Bus and Stagecoach under the ownership of the Student’s Union, abolishing the number 6 bus and banning all buses to Meadowhall.
What makes you different to the other candidates
We believe that we finally provide the real-world knowledge required to support students to the best of our abilities.
We also have over 2k followers on Instagram and they probably don’t. So that’s that.
What do you think are the main three problems facing students?
- The obvious main issue is the fact that the University changed their logo, and we can’t even lie, this keeps us up at night.
- Another key issue, as we have mentioned above, is the hills. Now, we know what you’re thinking, Sheffield is known for hills! Well we actually don’t care.
- So what we’re gonna do is abolish all lectures and seminars, and have club nights every single night (or like crochet for cool people).
Three things the University does well?
Give emotional distress (see above), uhhh I’ll get back to you on the other 2.
Forge has reported extensively on the SU’s campaign to reverse the cuts to Zoom Cards – Sheffield’s discount bus & tram travel scheme for young people. Would you continue this effort, and is there anything you would do differently?
Yes, we should bring back the Zoom 80p bus tickets, but we should also go further and make them free for anyone named Herbert.
What are your interests outside of student politics?
Well we kinda make memes, they are like kinda fun I guess, me and the other admins just meet up and meme around the place and then a post is made so that’s about it.
We also like hating on the Diamond. That’s kinda fun.
Talk to us about your future… what do you want to do after uni?
We are going to find a way to transplant our brains into a meme (preferably one of ours).
Where do you see yourself in 10 years time?
Hopefully still alive, hopefully still memeing.
Who would play you in a film of your life?
Michael Cera.
You can time travel to any year in history anywhere in the world. Where, when and why?
Probably like 1565, I don’t know what happened then and I’d like to know.
What living person do you most admire and why?
Robert, probably because there are so many of them just living their lives and I admire that.
You’ve just been elected SU president. How do you celebrate?
Probably make a meme about it and then get drunk while watching Smosh videos.
What’s your favourite thing about Sheffield?
You lovely lovely people.